Musings on the end of summer and passage of time
Hard to believe another summer has already passed. It feels like yesterday when we were all getting ready for Memorial Day with the entire summer ahead of us. Only a few short months left before the holidays and then 2024 is going to be upon us in the blink of an eye.
I remember as kids, summers seemed to stretch on forever. The wait for the next holiday season was never-ending. This illustration is a unique visualization on why time seems to accelerate as we age. When you were 5 years old, a year was 20% of your life, filled with brand new experiences and memories. Now, it’s a marginal ~3% filled mostly with the mundaneness of adult life.
Time is a topic I’ve thought a lot of about since becoming a dad. Our perceptions of it, how we spend it, how to maximize whatever left of it we have, etc. I imagine this is common among new parents. Watching your child grow up gives you a different perspective on your own journey in life.
The entire family took a quick road trip to DC last week – me, Tiffany, Julian and the pups. We hiked, ate, explored the museums and caught up with one of my college roommates. As we sat in his living room with our families, it struck me that we had known each other and the rest of our college friends for over 16 years. For those first 4 years (3.5 for me because of a minor run in with Rice police in my senior year), we saw each other every day. Now well into our 30s, most of us married with kids, we’re lucky if we can see each other 1-2x a year.
Most of our shared experience is well behind us. That inflection point probably passed years ago and I didn’t even notice. It might’ve even been when we graduated. We may see each other another 50 times before one of us dies. That’s for two healthy guys in the prime of our lives. What do you think that number would be for someone that’s older? Your parents or grandparents? For most everyone except our significant other and kids, you’re well into the second half of the aggregate amount of time spent together. You might be deep in the 4th quarter.
That remaining time can pass by quicker than you think, especially if you let it. One way to slow down the perception of time is to fill your life with new things. Try new experiences. Put yourself in uncomfortable situations. Take risks. This keeps your mind sharp and in a state of continued growth and learning. Preventing it from going on auto-pilot and you asking yourself in 5 years “where did all the time go?”
One of my biggest regrets in my life so far is not taking enough risks in my 20s. I’m not talking about the stupid, risky stuff we do when we’re younger. I did plenty of that. I’m talking about more calculated risks – changing careers, starting a business, etc. Taking those risks made more sense earlier in life, when there was less to lose and more time to make up for any failures.
Instead, I fell into the trap many of us do – thinking the right strategy was to establish yourself in a stable, well-paying career first before taking a big leap. Because the alternative of *gasp* falling behind by a year or two early on in a 40+ year career was unfathomable. The problem with this line of thinking, with prioritizing stability early in your career is that you’re never going to prioritize it less later. When things are too comfortable, taking that leap becomes much more difficult.
As I make my way through my 30s (still on the front half!), my intention is to be a little less risk averse and more open to taking leaps of faith in the future. But I’m also fully aware that the calculus now is much different than it was in my 20s.
You don’t know how much time you have left to do something truly meaningful, to spend with the people most important to you.
Make it worth it.